Saturday 3 May 2014

How not to doorstep a voter #147

So the doorbell rang and I opened it.

The person on the other side of the door said "Eugh! You're one of those."

I asked, "One of those what?"

"One of those perverts." came the reply.

I looked down and checked my fly was done up. It was. It was then that I noticed my t-shirt. It was one of my Pride ones. The female person who had rung our doorbell had quickly jumped to conclusions.

Thinking quickly I would have said, "Sorry, I have to go about my gay agenda for today, breakfast to be made (I had actually already had it), then I have my bible to read, lunch to eat, then this afternoon it is off to the bowls, back home for tea and then a little Saturday night TV. Now I know I don't look old enough to have been playing bowls for 35 years but if it is perversion of that nature then I pray you'll bear in mind that I play on council greens down in Ward Park and the person you are seeking to get elected will have responsibility for providing for my perversion. It is the least you can do as I do not appear to be equal under the law nor for such consideration by your party.

"Thank you for making your feelings abundantly clear. Now let me see what you are going to tell me so I can gauge just how near the bottom of my preferences I will actually place your candidates."

The hand proffered me two pieces of glossy paper one for Diane Dodds the other other for Leslie and Graham, before a red faced person turned on her heel and made her way unto one of my neighbours.

Read also: Not the first time I've encountered homophobia during election time, but last time I was the candidate.

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