Sunday 5 October 2008

Lord Voldemort of Hartlepool

The Muggle Prime Minister sat at his cabinet table unaware that he was under an Imperius Curse. Before him was an almost blank sheet of paper with the positions of his cabinet. Next to the title Business Secretary he'd already scrawled in his own blood the name of Lord Voldemort of Hartlepool.

The Dark Lord had been an ally to the Muggle Prime Minster's predecessor but he had for years stood up to the dark arts as practised by the Dark Lord before his seemingly expulsion to continental Europe. Indeed when he'd been appointed to the highest position in the muggle Government he'd declared that the darks arts of the Dark Lord and his media accomplish Rita Campbell would no longer have a place in his cabinet.

The Minister for Magic had been happy that the Muggle PM had listened to him about banishing the dark arts. He was sitting in his office when the morning owl delivered his copy of the the Daily Prophet. The muggle's Daily Profit had recently ceased to exist but he couldn't believe the picture he saw on the front page. There was the Dark Lord in a red v-necked sweater, blue tie with white polka dots, and grey suit was Lord Voldemort himself, about to be given a muggle peerage and his third chance to work within the cabinet.

The Minister heard a noise from his fire place. He turned just in time to see the new Secretary for Business emerge.

"Ah Kingsley," said the Secretary, "I see you have read of my latest appointment to the cabinet. I trust you weren't about to inform the Muggle Prime Minister of who I really am."

The Minister reached for his wand. But just as his hand touched it the Secretary uttered an Expelliarmus charm and it flung across the room.

"Dear Kingsley, have you forgotten the fate of poor Pius Thicknesse, or that of Rufus Scrimgeour. Either you can work for me, or." The Dark Lord left the threat hanging Kingsley Shacklebolt knew the fate of both his predecessors and the role the man standing across his desk now had had in their fates, after all he'd been a senior Auror fighting against Lord Voldemort with his colleagues in the Order of the Phoenix.

"Lord Vold..," he started.

"Please call me Peter," said the Dark Lord, "I quite like my muggle indentity. I've even got that Scottish muggle in charge of the Government to come to my way of thinking. He was more resistant that Tony was. But now I have been handed a position of trust in these dark times, it'll soon all be mine.

...to be continued

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