Thursday 20 December 2007

Happy Christmas - Today's New Crimes

Press Notice from the Labour Party:

(Note to self not for publication, everyone, well everyone that votes and matters, will be too busy at Christmas Parties getting drunk to notice)

New Year Resolutions:

To make paying for sex illegal that'll take care of the oldest profession.

(side margin) Aye Right!

To fill up our overcrowded prisions with people using mobile phones while driving even if using a hands-free kit. We'll leave the terms of dangerous driving up to the discretion of our infallible Police forces.

(side margin still visible) Does Jacqui realise just what she might be opening herself up for if she gets this through?
(reply) The Private Office is hoping she hasn't, is two years really long enough?

Now have a nice Christmas everyone, and don't panic we can't do anything about any of this until the new year.

Now where did I leave my bottle of Chardonnay.

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